There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
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