i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
