He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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