Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize
