I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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