M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
