I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
