HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize