If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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