I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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