My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
