Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
