Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
We need a shit load of segways right now
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
