Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize