Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Randomize
