making cat noises will not fix the situation.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
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