My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
