Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
