her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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