i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
