White coat. Heels.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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