I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
