stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
