If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
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