I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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