then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
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you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
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I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
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