so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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