Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
