I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
