I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Less talking, more tequila
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
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