What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
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