Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize