soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
