After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Randomize
