When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Randomize
