I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
