So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Randomize