Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
