Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I wish you could order shots online.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I need to calm my uterus...
Randomize
