I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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