guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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