i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.