I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
