Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize
