How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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