I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
