apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
