ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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