apparently the secret to your success is patron
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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