i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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